There's been a broken Volvo S80 in my parking spot for three days now

"AestheticsInMotion" (aestheticsinmotion)
10/01/2019 at 20:51 • Filed to: None

It’s an S80. There’s a massive puddle of oil underneath it. The lights were left on overnight.

I have absolutely no idea who it belongs to, but I think the universe is trying to tell me something.

(buuuuuuy anotheeeeeer Volvooooooooo)

DISCUSSION (44)

Stef Schrader > AestheticsInMotion
10/01/2019 at 21:03

(buuuuuuy anotheeeeeer Volvoooooooo)

It’s in your parking spot, so are you sure it’s not yours already?

facw > AestheticsInMotion
10/01/2019 at 21:04

Are you sure you didn’t drunkenly buy one Friday night? Maybe it already belongs to you?

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > Stef Schrader
10/01/2019 at 21:12

Maybe he has an alternate personality that buys Volvos...

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > AestheticsInMotion
10/01/2019 at 21:17

It’s telling you to find the sketchiest scrap yard in the area, and do someone a favor.

AestheticsInMotion > Stef Schrader
10/01/2019 at 21:19

*checks bank account*

SiennaMan > facw
10/01/2019 at 21:19

The last time I was car shopping while inebriated I seriously considered buying an old Ford Taurus. It’s a long story..

AestheticsInMotion > facw
10/01/2019 at 21:20

I’m not sure how I feel that this is everybody’s first thought.

(the interior is gorgeous)

CB > Eric @ opposite-lock.com
10/01/2019 at 21:21

Like Tyler Durden, but with Volvos instead of fight clubs.

CB > AestheticsInMotion
10/01/2019 at 21:21

90% sure it’s stolen.

NKato > AestheticsInMotion
10/01/2019 at 21:22

Call a tow truck. If it's an assigned parking space, you have the right to remove unauthorized parkers.

AestheticsInMotion > NKato
10/01/2019 at 21:26

Meh. I only have one car now, and there's plenty of visitor parking. I'm not stressing.

AestheticsInMotion > CB
10/01/2019 at 21:28

What are the chances that someone would steal a Volvo, and have it break down in the same parking space where two other volvos of the same generation had recently broken down?

No, it’s a sign from God. He wants me to accept the 5-cylinder back into my heart

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > AestheticsInMotion
10/01/2019 at 21:35

Check the trunk, you might find ForSweden.

SBA Thanks You For All The Fish > AestheticsInMotion
10/01/2019 at 21:42

“time to go to IKEA for meatballs?”

SBA Thanks You For All The Fish > AestheticsInMotion
10/01/2019 at 21:45

In fairness, the 5 cylinder thing IS a sign of a true believer.

Are you CERTAIN we aren’t dealing with a Tyler Durden situation? Because that seems like the obvious answer, especially with Helena Bonham-Carter’s lingerie in the back seat...

SBA Thanks You For All The Fish > facw
10/01/2019 at 21:45

(pssst. Tyler Durden. Humor him...)

SBA Thanks You For All The Fish > SiennaMan
10/01/2019 at 21:46

Weird. Usually the heavy drinking begins AFTER ownership commences.

punkgoose17 > AestheticsInMotion
10/01/2019 at 21:49

I am surprised it is not yours.

shop-teacher > AestheticsInMotion
10/01/2019 at 22:21

Why do you hate yourself?

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > CB
10/01/2019 at 22:31

Exactly.

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > punkgoose17
10/01/2019 at 22:33

I bet his neighbors would be, too.

AestheticsInMotion > SBA Thanks You For All The Fish
10/01/2019 at 22:41

And now I want a 5 cylinder Volvo with a Borg-Warner 6258 bolted on for good measure

AestheticsInMotion > Eric @ opposite-lock.com
10/01/2019 at 22:41

I came to that conclusion too. Literally everyone here is going to assume the broken leaking car is mine

AestheticsInMotion > shop-teacher
10/01/2019 at 22:42

But... But... Swedish luxury! These ones were actually made in S weden too!!

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > AestheticsInMotion
10/01/2019 at 22:51

I mean, if you didn’t obtain the car in some fugue state, it has definitely chosen the only spot in a fairly large area where nobody would question it being there... Certainly a very unlikely coincidence.

mXxxxXm24 /O/ /O/ > AestheticsInMotion
10/01/2019 at 22:55

I’m pretty sure squatter’s rights apply here.

SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media > AestheticsInMotion
10/01/2019 at 23:36

Leave a note on the windscreen requesting the owner place the title papers in your post box... otherwise it will be towed after Halloween.

Future Heap Owner > AestheticsInMotion
10/01/2019 at 23:40

Nothing on my V50 has broken in 4 months, gmctavish’s V70 has run flawlessly since he got it, and even the V70 Akio got made it all the way up to Anchorage. It’s time!

facw > Future Heap Owner
10/01/2019 at 23:55

I’d like to point out that aside from the ominous transmission clunk, the crank nut falling off, the mysterious occasional coolant loss, and the fact that sometimes my remote won’t unlock anything other than the driver’s side door, nothing has gone wrong with my S60 in the two years I’ve owned it. I mean there are a few other things that have been broken since before I bought it, but you know as long as my sunroof can slide back, I don’t really care if it can also pop up like it’s supposed to, and as long as I keep the fan at 60% or less, you can barely notice the failing blower trying to shake itself (and the rest of the car) apart.

Alfalfa > AestheticsInMotion
10/02/2019 at 00:43

This certainly raises some questions, the most important one being does it have the Yamaha 4.4?

EDIT: zoom and enhance indicates that it's not. Boo.

pip bip - choose Corrour > AestheticsInMotion
10/02/2019 at 00:59

claim it

shop-teacher > AestheticsInMotion
10/02/2019 at 07:13

I'm sure it's a lovely place to be broken down and out of money in.

Snuze: Needs another Swede > AestheticsInMotion
10/02/2019 at 08:00

Law of Salvage : The law of salvage is a principle of maritime law wher eby any person who helps recover another person’s ship or cargo in peril at sea is entitled to a reward commensurate with the value of the property salved.

Go fix something on it. Anything. It’s now your Volvo.

CalzoneGolem > Eric @ opposite-lock.com
10/02/2019 at 08:56

I’m voting carbon monoxide induced fugue state.

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > AestheticsInMotion
10/02/2019 at 09:19

Don’t these have a sideways I6?

TysMagic > AestheticsInMotion
10/02/2019 at 10:14

I think the universe is trying to tell you to commandeer another Volvo

MrBochie > AestheticsInMotion
10/02/2019 at 10:32

I have a 2007 .... I’ve seen videos of people getting literally almost a million miles out of them. If you take care of them they will run forever. Well at least the ones before 2010 when they were still fully Swed ... You can bring it back to life. But at this point you don't want to see you pockets battle your bank account over trying to rebirth a Volvo.

RPM esq. > AestheticsInMotion
10/02/2019 at 12:59

Apparently you’re Craigslisting in your sleep now.

VuhGynaFloss > AestheticsInMotion
10/02/2019 at 14:24

I got a Volvo s80 t6 leaks oil same color TWIN TURBO

AestheticsInMotion > facw
10/02/2019 at 14:25

What a beautiful comment

AestheticsInMotion > AMGtech - now with more recalls!
10/02/2019 at 14:26

Probably. That sounds right

Spanfeller is a twat > AestheticsInMotion
10/02/2019 at 15:05

The ghost of volvos past is haunting you.

For Sweden > AestheticsInMotion
10/03/2019 at 00:45

Universe: Gives you something awesome

You: Thanks I hate it

punkgoose17 > AestheticsInMotion
10/04/2019 at 19:32

Any updates on the mystery Volvo?